Listening

I've always been a better listener than talker.  Even when I was a little girl, it was more natural for me to listen than to talk.  But graciously, the Lord has taught me how to use words.  And I now talk too much...  it's okay, I knew you were going to say it too.

Over the past few weeks, Yaya has been expressing more through her words.  By not just using her words to talk, but using her words to express her emotions.  When I child does this, we don't always want to listen.  Especially if it involves self-centeredness or whining over circumstances; both being sins which we see in our own hearts (all of the time if you're me).  During these times with children, it's easier to talk at them instead of listening to them.

This morning I was reading "Shepherding a Child's Heart" and a wonderful verse was highlighted by the author, Tedd Tripp: "A fool takes no pleasure in understanding, but only in expressing his opinion." Proverbs 18:2.  Tripp says,

"The finest art of communication is not learning how to express your thoughts.  It is learning how to draw out the thoughts of another.  Your objective in communication must be to understand your child, not simply to have your child understand you.  Many parents never learn these skills.  They never discover how to help their children articulate their thoughts and feelings." p. 73

He adds a little later:

"What is important in correction is not venting your feelings, anger or hurt; it is, rather, understanding the nature of the struggle that your child is having. What is important is understanding the 'why' of what has been done or said." p. 74

I admit that when being faced with the truth of Proverbs 18:2, I can honestly say that I am a fool.  I don't listen, I give vent to my own opinions.  And when it comes to the children and others in my life, I don't want to be a fool.  I want to listen because it's through listening than we gain understanding.